The notion that humans are little more than self-programming computers (programmed by parents, society, and social media) may have some validity. We bump into others and situation that we can add to our programming, or not. With this in mind…
I had an odd experience at the store earlier this week that I’ve been meaning to mention to you.
I’d done a fair bit of shopping, but there was nothing frozen in the grocery cart, so I was fairly mellow about it and not in my usual 10 MPH over /blood pressure rising A mode.
With nothing but the working end of a shovel and rake waiting at home, I decided to watch people and try to enjoy them – much as you’d do on a trip to the zoo.
I knew there was something wrong with the checkout line I picked. There was no one in it, and the checker was standing with an impatient look, hands on her hips. Her customer (a little overfed and not sharply dressed) was also fidgeting, rummaging through her purse and judging by the lines around us, I figured this had been going on for 5-minutes of so.
“Your computer down?” I asked as cheerfully as I could.
“No, we’re just waiting for change.”
Ure’s steel trap mind sized up the probabilities.
“I’ll just load my stuff on the belt,” I reckoned. “Surely, this can’t take that long…’
I was wrong.
Seeing my slow-motion loading of my cart onto the conveyor belt, a busy-looking woman had bustled up behind me. She was nervously looking at her watch.
So another five minutes goes by. My stuff is on the belt. Life in our lane was stopped.
And after a further three or four minutes of everyone standing around watching a lot of nothing, the busy-looking woman behind me, who apparently hadn’t heard the “Getting change” part of the conversation burst out “What’s the hold-up?”
“We’re waiting on change.”
Another minute of two wanders by; why this is almost like watching kittens about to scrap. The busy-looking woman behind me was tapping her foot, but obviously was letting her clock and blood pressure get the best of her.
“Just how much change are you waiting for?” the busy lady blurted.
“10-cents” announced the customer who was overweight and had a lot of ‘tude.
Quick as a wink, the busy-looking lady had pulled out a dime, tossed it to the customer and the logjam broke.
I’m not clever enough to make this stuff up – but a finer lesson about human behavior, served up at the local Kroger checkout line, could not be had. Who would have thought? Human nature lessons come at the damnedest times.
I’m not kidding about the time we all spent standing there: The customer had decided to stand her ground for a dime even though it took at least 15-minutes on the clock and who knows how much more before I got there. The math on this was simple: The customer waiting on the dime valued her time at a whopping 40-cents an hour.
The Busy-Looking Lady, on the other hand, valued her time much more dearly. A 5-minute delay was totally unacceptable – especially for the price of a dime – so I knew that the Busy Lady valued her time somewhere north of $1.20 per hour.
Me? Well, I was there strict in “watch and report mode.” On the way home, though, I had 20-minutes to try and select which of the old sayings best fit this situation.
“I bargained with life for a penny and life would pay me nothing more.”
“If you want something done, give it to a busy person.”
“Look before you leap” (at least at grocery store lines)
Intellectually, it was exhilarating. Until I got to the part where it wasn’t just the customer waiting for 40-cents an hour – it was four grown ups including (gulp!) me.
Wowzers. Time to park the observer mode again and get back to being a good little Type A. But it sure is fun to drop into “observer mode” now and then to see what lessons are out there, waiting for nothing more than some idiot to come along and catch them.
A Compliment to IRS
I habitually overpay our taxes. I always want the government to owe me – not the other way around. Keeps our relationship on an even keel.
This year, doing the TurboTax / e-filing thing, our refund hit the bank account in 13-days. I’m not easily impressed, but this one deserve mention. Well done!
I was just talking to John the other day, the fellow who delivered the pea gravel, about this problem with the flow of news. People always say they want to hear a little good news now and then, but the ratings don’t show it. The yellower and more riled up and self-righteous, the better. Ask faux.
The proof is out there, too: Next time you’re lined up to pass a wreck on the freeway, which everybody is slowing down to look at – hoping to see blood, I imagine – ask yourself “Do people really care when something goes right?”
Sadly, you know the answer.
The Idiot’s Chronicles
The ‘Merican people must not be terribly bright. There’s a whole article in Wired this morning that explains in excruciating detail “Why Obama said Global Warming gave his Daughter Asthmas.”
Google “Obama Smokes” sometime.
I don’t run a casino, but I’d wager that you know where my bet is on this. And no, I don’t think Michelle’s organic garden is turning out enough GMO-free food, either.
But what do I know? I’ve only had asthma for 66-years. Flo-Vent. Albuterol, or Singulair, Mr.